new year resolutions

bothering me is the 'new year' part. and, i shouldn't ask: what's the point? but i have, so . . .

we be-atch about ourselves all year. that's enough. isn't it. intrinsic awareness of flaw. why. in the final hour. is there this collective pressure to create a list. tabling our blemished durations. the most challenging continuations of ourselves at that. promising to do them

promising who. respectfully, barring serious life threats; respectfully, barring non-petty quality resolutions; respectfully, because let's just admit not all resolutions are equal, who are we promising. ourselves. the self we are. right handing the self we want to be. in so self pledging to abandon self in result of a new self. is it a surprise new year resolutions aren't kept

why would self allow self to kill it off. besides, its easier to accept who we are. rather than create a failure of self. but, my issue remains in the attachment of 'new year'. seriously, if we are, if we can, we just would. no out loud professions

spoken pursuit of what can and will and should and could and ought . . . and, ink to paper is not the finality of commitment either. paper disintegrates to touch. is easily trashed. but who writes new year resolutions down. they're haunting, let alone memorized

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i wonder. how many of us are too liquored. to remember the resolution. or maybe. self reaches from the mirror. to slap our face. cursing mad. at the premeditated identity murder. that is exactly what it is. identity murder


or maybe. someone hears the resolution. sees us in and for the possibility us. compliments us as we are, although they are viewing the possible us. in which we interpret self affirmation. and forget the resolution. no, better yet, we for-get the resolution. not preoccupied, but self-ly satisfied

what do people say. when they see you after you've, let's say, lost weight, stopped smoking crack, or some other significantly visual change. i didn't recognize you. or, the smart arse i hardly recognized you. or, and this one boy-oh-boy, is that you. who wants to hear this she-at. and, since not striking a significant change isn't worth the effort

because 1) no one notices, and 2) it won't take much to reverse what's been done, why bother. honestly. the results aren't for us. the results are for others. to see. it can be done. for others. to see. you did it, and they didn't. lace up - here come the joneses

resolution. to resolve. the intent to resolve. the desire or appearance of desire to resolve. the perpetual stalkings of unresolved that need or want to be resolved

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it is the knowing that we could that tempts us. has to be. the knowing that we just might that traps us. or, the weakness in us because we could have and didn't but can and are not sure if will. this reasoning is actually very likely. exhibition of weakness as a fellowship tool is a timeless technique. plus, on an individual level, weakness allows us to pace ourselves in success

yes, i don't think resolutions are about us. i'm talking about the outward expression of resolution. true, resolutions signify hope and long-term motive. still, it is only a competition. how bad am i. stay with me: resolutions = a first-person assessment of self using current self as a point of reference. others are the marker

markers in the big picture. i'm in bad shape. but in general, i'm doing pretty good

which is why resolutions often fail. i could be a lot worse. but even without this concession, i'm still doing pretty good for myself. why tamper. why try to fix. is it really broken. so why the mental torture. that's what resolutions are . humanizing reminders that we all fall short. but in this case, falling short isn't necessary

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it is an unnecessary imposition to even attempt a new year's resolution. especially, since. if it was that big a deal we would have resolved it already, and not because the year is ending. besides, who cares. at absolute, resolutions are heat of the moment offerings. that some of us truly need to resolve. and others of us don't

but carry on as we do. to fit in, probably. new year's resolutions sound good, and some are spoken in earnest intent, still there's the bulk of us who just can't do the da*n thing (#3: no more senseless cursing - should be no cursing but 1 must take it slow, you know, ease off the morphine drip. caution: cold turkey can kill)

anyhoot, traditions must persist so maybe i'll just add 'stop complaining' to my list next fawking year